You know it’s really fucked up when you have all that feelings of yours bottled up and you can’t just throw it all out. I tried talking to H about it but I don’t seem to figure why I can’t just let go of it.

L tried talking to me about it some time back H was in rehab (seriously rehab? LOL). Well, according to her things can work if i__________. But the fault doesn’t always have to be me, does it? To clap your hands, you need BOTH the hands for it, not one. And L said that, that bugger has a HUMANGOUS ego problem and I should be the calm one and sort it out, like always huh? I’m tried of being the nicer one, it’s your turn. Show me you can be nice. Or is it too much to ask for?


Sometimes, I wish I could just cry my lungs out and get over done with the burden which I have been carrying for a year now. But I have been hiding from it that even if I want to face I can’t. Its like instilled in me to ignore this situation. And just the other day I saw that bugger; I was numb and had no reaction on my face. It felt like as if we are strangers once again.


Anyway, I saw this poem online which sorta suits my situation. Not totally but a little.


I knew your dreams
Because we used to talk
For hours at a time.

I knew your friendship
Because you were always there
When I needed your comfort.

I knew your pain
Because you trusted me enough
To share your past with me.

I knew your fears
Because you helped me
To see that mine were the same.

I knew what was important to you
Because you were always
So honest with me.

I knew your goals
Because I felt the enthusiasm
In your words when you talked of them.

I knew your guidance
Because you patiently explained
The things I didn't understand.

I knew your heart
Because I saw right into it
And felt it a part of my own.

I knew your honor
Because you let me go
When I fell in love with you.

And I knew your love
Because you wouldn't let me dream
of us together.

Labels: bored and not sleepy, haisss

LONG TIME SINCE I BLOGGED!

Dear loyal readers,
How you been surviving without me? Anyway I am just so pissed right now.
I just can’t stand people who are there with you when they fucking need you.
I mean I have been there always, and so have you. Now suddenly you think I am not fit enough for you, to share your problems. Thank you so much for showing me what I actually am in your life.

You know what the real fucked up thing is, you go around showing off the millions of guys talking to you with that not-so-great looking face of yours. Basically, you are living in denial and you think that I am wrong. I feel that you have and you think I am wrong. Well, the fucking truth is always bitter. Live with it hun.

Oh and a little message to a dear friend unlike somebody, well himanshu it’s a rough phase for you, I hope u get over it soon and be all e fucked up kid again instead of e emo one. HAHA. Love you kutta, I am always here whenever you need me.

Labels: :)

bloody hell,i have itchy fingers. i was so bored that i MISTAKELY made my blog private. and e reaction from himanshu was UNEXPECTED,hahahaha!

anyway,Ns finally out! SCHOOL'S OUT-PARTY IN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
been drinking since sat,i feel sick!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY L! love you many many. hahaha.

anyway,one more N lvl paper left,cant take it anymore. i wanna get over and done with it. ughhhhhhhhhhhh! ANYWAY,have got so many plans after Ns. MY BIRTHDAY,CHALET,PROOM(which is screwed,BIG time.).

i dont know,im just so confused,proom is in school and i so DONT wanna go. i mean you wear ALL e nice outfits and go where? SCHOOL? nahhhh. HAHHAHAHA.